“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.” Buddha
When I was young I was a fan of the movie Space Jam. I loved Michael Jordan, I played basketball even if I was not very good at it and I loved the featured song I believe I can fly. It is only very recently that I understood that this song was about hope, perseverance and beliefs – I concede that it is expressed in a very simple way and easy way. As humans, we are built of beliefs.
We are going to explore what beliefs are, why they take such a great space in our lives and how to make good use of them.
When start our beliefs?
A belief is a general rule of a life experience we have internalised. We have an absolute certainty in this rule and hold strong convictions about it. Beliefs can be things we have heard, seen or experienced repeatedly or not necessarily. Beliefs are built through education, family or culture. For instance in France, parents tell their children to eat soup so that they will get tall. Advertisement tends also to install beliefs around beauty.
Beliefs shape our experiences and are reinforced by them. Imagine a table. Can you see the plank standing on its legs? If the legs are removed, the plank cannot stand alone. If you keep on saying you have bad luck (plank), I am pretty sure that you have stories that came to support this bad luck (legs). I always say that I have Beginner’s luck. Every time I play a game for the first time, I win. Why is that? Because I do not have any prejudice about the game, so I am very unlikely to attract a negative outcome. On the contrary, I have this strong conviction that I have beginner’s luck.
Why our beliefs are important?
What we believe has an impact on our feelings and on our actions:
- they impact on how we interpret the world around us. Beliefs act like glasses: when you wear them they modify your sight by colouring, darkening or reshaping your world. Beliefs act the same way: you already heard single people saying that decent men/women do not exist…
- they can expand or reduce your possibilities: they give you strength or prevent you from doing other things. A very common one is “It is difficult to learn a new language as an adult”. I have heard this one very often and those people struggle to learn languages.
- they support or sabotage our goals: have you ever noticed how you do exactly the opposite of what you are supposed to? A part of you may be sabotaging you because what you are doing is not in sync with your values. Say you always lack money and you would like to be wealthier. At the same time you believe that people with money are unlikable, pretentious and boring individuals. Do you see the conflict of values here?
Remember the importance of beliefs in the habit change process: change is easier when a belief supports it.
Watch out your thoughts; they can be allies or enemies in your journey.
New beliefs are the starting point of a new life
What can you do if you experience more negative than positive things in your life? You can set new beliefs that will come to support your goals and the life you are willing to create!
- Identify your current beliefs: Take one field of your life in which you are unhappy. Examine all the beliefs or rules you have on the subject and ask your friends and partner to help you uncover the beliefs. You may have self-fulfilling prophecies that you frequently repeat without being aware of it.
- Choose your new beliefs as carefully as you would choose new shoes or a new car: now you have identified your past beliefs, wave them good bye since they do not serve you anymore. Then take the exact opposite of what you are currently having in your life and set new useful rules. If, as a single person, you claim that there is no good man/woman in your country, decide to start now believing that there is plenty of wonderful people for you everywhere in the country.
- Visualisation
“Now I have gotten back into the rhythm of [visualisation], of seeing what I want to see, seeing what I don’t want to see, seeing what I possibly could see. I’m trying to picture it all, everything I possibly can, so that I’m ready for anything that happens” Michael Phelps.
Creative visualisation is a very powerful tool used by many athletes to be in a resourceful state while they compete in order to increase their chance of winning.
You can use visualisation by imagining, feeling experiencing the life you will have with the new belief and repeat the process every day.
The following verse of the song is an illustration of the visualisation process “I can see it, then I can do it, if I just believe it, there’s nothing to it“.
- Create new experiences to validate and support your plank. Observe your surroundings and ask the people close to you what they believe. Is your negative belief 100% true for you? If not, can you remember one of the times the rule had an exception? Re-live this experience, exaggerate it and change it now.
Remember what Henri Ford said “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right”.
Photo credits: PiVer
I believe you have written a great article here Yayi 🙂 . Nice work. This will be very useful for a lot of people. In fact, we all need to be reminded to control our beliefs instead of the other way around. Well done.